Last Train for the Coast

The Golden Child turns into a hookah-smoking caterpillar:

Boy chosen by Dalai Lama turns back on Buddhist order

As a toddler, he was put on a throne and worshipped by monks who treated him like a god. But the boy chosen by the Dalai Lama as a reincarnation of a spiritual leader has caused consternation – and some embarrassment – for Tibetan Buddhists by turning his back on the order that had such high hopes for him.

Instead of leading a monastic life, Osel Hita Torres now sports baggy trousers and long hair, and is more likely to quote Jimi Hendrix than Buddha.

At six, he was allowed to socialise only with other reincarnated souls – though for a time he said he lived next to the actor Richard Gere's cabin.

Ah. Richard Gere. The path to corruption begins to reveal itself...

By 18, he had never seen couples kiss. His first disco experience was a shock. "I was amazed to watch everyone dance. What were all those people doing, bouncing, stuck to one another, enclosed in a box full of smoke?"

I haven't figured that one out, either. Nor has Travolta, for that matter; I believe it may have something to do with Scientology. And if you think being a monk was stupefyingly boring, try reading Dianetics

In Tibetan Buddhism, a lama is one of a lineage of reincarnated spiritual leaders...

Not to be confused with LLAMAS!!! (Okay, okay... I promise that's the last flashy llama sign -- for the rest of this week.)