Kill it with fire

As if it weren't bad enough we've had to endure a plague of lawyers for thousands of years, we now have to deal with "patent trolls" -- litigation groups who acquire dubious (and often spurious) patents, then use them like legal billy-clubs to extort money from business owners and individual citizens.

This is probably the worst yet: they're claiming anyone who is offering free wi-fi service to customers -- such as coffee houses and hotels -- has to pay licensing fees to their "patent." It's patently ridiculous, of course, but until someone ponies up the big cash to get these scum-sucking shit-eaters into court, they'll continue blackmailing small companies who can't afford the legal fees.

As any good adventurer knows, there's only one way to kill trolls: you have to set them on fire. Let's start with these ones.