Street Value

Google Street View: is there anything it can't do?

Three brazen heroin dealers were captured in Google Street View images working their favorite Brooklyn drug corner, where they peddled their product to hipsters and other dope fiends, law-enforcement sources said yesterday.

Undercover cops dressed as hipsters made 20 drug buys, purchasing $10 envelopes of heroin stamped with brand names such as "Fed Ex," "KFC," "Powerful Impact," "Magik" and "Crossbones," the sources said.

Heroin marketed under the KFC label. Gee, I wonder which demographic makes up the target market? That's a tough one.

"They were catering to the hipster crowd, among other customers," said one law-enforcement source.

"Hipsters." Does he mean that as in "dirty stinking commie-lovin' hippies," or as in "hip-hoppers," (a.k.a. - rappers)? I don't have a problem with either group removing themselves from existence by shooting up on horse until their brains melt. In fact, I think it should be encouraged. It'd be a far better use of my tax money than welfare checks and stimulus packages.

Attention, hipsters! Come get your Nordplants and vasectomies, free of charge! Every visit qualifies you for a Whitman's Sampler of crack, meth, and heroin -- guaranteed to turn your sub-standard brain into cranial pâté in 90 days or less!