Apathy Curve: Hook 'em up

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Friday, August 06, 2010

Hook 'em up

I'm introducing a new service: The Apathy Curve Matchmaking Concierge. Our first participants are Bernadette and George...

911 for a date?

Police in Ohio said they arrested a woman accused of drunkenly dialing 911 and telling dispatchers she was looking for a date.

She should call this guy:

Police in Florida say a man who called 911 to ask for a ride to the liquor store wound up arrested for misuse of 911 and possession of marijuana.

Congratulations, happily ever after, blah blah, whatthefuckever. Glad we could help. Just do us a favor in return: don't reproduce.

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