High Maintenance Bitch

So says the marquee of a high-end dog salon in Seattle. Naturally, the neo-hippies are up in arms about it:

"I am probably the most progressive liberal person in the world and I am personally offended by the sign," said Janet Stillman, executive director of the Wallingford Neighborhood Office. "It's so blatant and so in your face."

"Progressive liberal." In the distant past, in another place, that label actually meant something good. Not so today. In fact, allow me to translate Ms. Stillman's statement into modern American vernacular: "I am probably the most provincial, arrogant, willfully ignorant, under-educated, overfed, inexperienced, whiny pseudo-intellectual in the world and I am personally offended by the sign..."

Doesn't sound quite as impressive when translated, does it Ms. Stillman? Your assumed entitlements stop at the end of your excessively busy nose. Get over yourself.