All Secure Here, Sir!

It's possible I was a bit hasty in my previous allegations that apartment complex managers are the dumbest people on the planet. It would appear they're actually second in line, behind airport security thugs:

A girl of six triggered a security scare at an airport – with a pink Bugs Bunny water pistol rammed full of sweets.

Kelly Vinnicombe was bought the £2.50 toy in the departure lounge by her mother Sarah, and packed it in her bag.

But, as they went through the X-ray security machine, guards hauled them to one side...[and told them] the toy was technically a 'weapon' and would have to be registered at the firearms desk.

A Cape Town airport spokeswoman insisted: "It's is better to be safe than sorry."

All hyperbole aside, I have quite literally hired and worked side-by-side with day laborers--people who dig ditches for pennies an hour--who were possessed of more mental agility than these airport "security" blockheads. Furthermore, I entertain absolutely no doubt that Wilson W. Boothe could tell the difference between a dangerous weapon and a candy-filled plastic toy.

Wilson is a basset hound, by the way. He finds endless entertainment in such activities as licking the pavement.

When you're actually dumber than a dog, you've pretty much proven your genetic undesirability. All members of the Cape Town Airport security force will please report to the nearest sterilization center.