Doctor of the Blindingly Obvious

It's difficult for me to properly express my contempt for these ivory tower idiots:

Researchers found people with gum disease who ate two grapefruits a day for a fortnight showed significantly less bleeding from the gums.

They believe this is due to an increase in blood levels of vitamin C, known to promote wound healing and cut damage by unstable free radical molecules.

The fact that vitamin C, most easily introduced to the body by consumption of citrus fruits, is a preventative for scurvy and other gum diseases was discovered and published by James Lind over two hundred and fifty years ago. The term "limey" is derived from 18th and 19th century British sailors' practice of consuming limes and lemons to ward off scurvy. But it's apparently big news and a scientific breakthrough to German "researchers" and the British Dental Journal.

After years of painstaking "research," I have "discovered" that reading books increases your knowledge and prevents repeated re-invention of the wheel. In corollary, extended residence on a modern university campus causes brain rot.