Stupid Hippie Tricks
Meditating moron:
I say we stop it up with 10,000 dead hippies.
A fix for the gushing oil well a mile beneath the Gulf of Mexico has so far eluded scientists and engineers armed with technical know-how and high-tech robotic submarines.
So one Boulder man is calling upon people from around the world to try a different, simpler tack: meditation.
"The basic concept is to try and get as many people to visualize that the valve is actually functioning and is working and closing," said Carl Fuermann, a staff member in the University of Colorado's Registrar Office.
I say we stop it up with 10,000 dead hippies.
posted by Jar(egg)head at 08:12
2 Comments:
Technically speaking I believe it could take over a million hippies to pile them high enough and with enough weight in water to stop the leak. However, while logistically more challenging I believe it is worth a try since there's nothing to lose and everything to gain. My only other worry is that their long unwashed hair will cause another oil slick that will be stinky (that's a respected technical term). Hmmm, I wonder if cats could be used as kind of the filler between the hippies.
Perhaps if we built a large wooden badger and stuffed them all inside before lowering it into place. This way, we could encourage the growth of a new coral reef on the badger to create a tourist attraction and help plug the hole. It shouldn't take much time for the air to run out and they would snuff it. And as to not be considered horrible people we will ask for volunteers from VHEMT.
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