Is that the garage?

How 'bout some new doorways, granny?

A boozed-up driver tore through a 96-year-old woman’s Long Island house on Monday, spinning such a devastating path of destruction that the stove wound up in the back yard

The driver’s mother, Susan Anderson, was in shock when told her about the crash. “Oh, my God! This is not like her. I don’t know what’s going on,” the shaken-up mother said. “She doesn’t have a car in the city. I don’t know whose it is.”

Oops.

“She has her own life; she’s been away for a couple of years now. I don’t even know who her friends are,” her mother said.

One of them owns (er, owned) a Mercedes.

Nothing seemed wrong,” said the friend, who did not want to be identified. “She likes to have fun after the job, but nothing crazy,” the friend added.

"Nothing crazy." You know: have a few drinks, throw her legs over her head for an hour, drive an $80K import through granny's house... All in a weekend's entertainment.

Anderson and an unidentified man riding in the car suffered minor injuries.

I'm guessing that's Mercedes-boy. Never let 'em drive your ride, buddy -- even if they have chrome around their lips.