Nice Dress, Nancy-Boy

Goin' girly:

For school officials in Haverford Township, the challenge was daunting: What do you do when a 9-year-old student, with the full support of his parents, decides that he is no longer a boy and instead is a girl?

Wait a minute, I know this one... OH! I've got it! You beat his ass and tell him "You're a boy, idiot! Now stop whining and go eat some dirt or something."

Parents of a third-grade student at Chatham Park Elementary School approached the administration on April 16 to ask for help in making a "social transition" for their child.

The Haverford School District consulted experts on transgender children, then sent letters to parents advising them that the guidance counselor would meet with the school's 100 third-grade students to explain why their classmate would now wear girls' clothes and be called by a girl's name.

Right.

We're doomed. I think I'll just head home and get drunk. Again.