The Ron

Even if you've never watched a porn flick in your life, chances are good you've heard of Ron Jeremy. He's a dumpy little troll who is nonetheless charming; he brings the "average Joe" feel to an industry packed with plastic people. He is one of those rare people who you can't help but like, with a reputation for quipping witty but truthful dime-store philosophy.

Having been put out of "the biz" by age (and Viagra), Ron is now looking to get back into the mainstream of acting from whence he came... (Sorry; had to be done).

Porn star Ron Jeremy wants to be taken seriously -- with his clothes on.

Dressed in a dark track suit with a protruding belly that shows he is past his physical prime, Jeremy hardly strikes you as one of the most successful American porn stars.

Ron Jeremy had a "physical prime"? News to me.

In a new memoir, "Ron Jeremy: The Hardest (Working) Man in Showbiz," he said audiences identified with him because he was just like them -- hairy, with a mustache and standing just 5 feet 6 inches tall.

"They look at themselves in the mirror and think, Y'know, compared to Ron Jeremy, I'm not that bad looking at all," Jeremy says in the book released this month.

"To me, porn and reality TV are similar. I don't mind being in them," he said. "I just can't stand watching them."

The primary difference being that reality television only sucks up time.